AI can help to clarify or complicate your interpersonal communication. Turn towards it if you need help communicating better. Turn away from it when you find it makes the situation more complicated.
AI CAN BE YOUR COMMUNICATION COACH
Wouldn’t it be nice to have a communication coach review a message before you sent it? Wouldn’t it be helpful if your coach advised you to “rethink” your message’s wording and/or timing? AI can help you consider how your words might sound to someone else. For example, before sending an angry message, you might turn to AI for suggestions on how to transmit the message without sounding accusatory. Consulting AI could help you slow down and consider your message’s impact before you press “send.”
SEE THE OTHER SIDE
Perspective taking or understanding an interaction from someone else’s point of view, is one of the hardest communication skills to master. For instance, let’s say your friend has not responded to a message you sent them marked “Urgent.” You could ask AI to come up with five possible explanations for their behavior. AI might suggest they were overwhelmed, busy, meant to respond but forgot to push send, or had something else happen that had nothing to do with you. Although AI doesn’t know which explanation is correct, it can remind you that your first interpretation isn’t the only interpretation.
YOU’RE HUMAN, AI IS NOT
If AI writes your apology, your expression of love, your response to a friend’s bad day, at some point your friend might ask themselves: Am I communicating with a machine? Relationships require authenticity. There’s a big difference between asking AI for assistance and having it do your work. Use AI as a coach, not as a substitute. Also know when not to use it. Before consulting AI ask: “Do I need help communicating, or do I need to communicate?” The best prompt may be one you ask another person, rather than AI.
ACTION PLAN
Come up with a real, but low-risk interpersonal situation such as deciding to decline an invitation, asking a partner to clean up after themselves, or disagreeing with a friend. First, write the message yourself. Then give the situation to AI, with this prompt: “Suggest a message that is clear, respectful, empathic, and authentic.” Compare your version with AI’s version. Consider what AI improved and what it made worse? Then develop a third version that combines AI’s useful suggestions with your authentic voice. The goal isn’t to use AI to communicate for you, but to use AI to become a more thoughtful communicator.
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